photo of woman wearing white dress near flower arbor
Photo by Quang Nguyen Vinh on


Hey my peeps I pray all is well with ya’ll, I’m doing as good as I can be considering the emotional and spiritual turmoil I’ve been in since my wedding day. I notified family and friends of my engagement and eventual marriage in February of this year, I sent 60 invitations out to friends inviting them to our celebration, they all RSVP’D and said they would come. I ordered and cooked enough food to feed 60 people, I cooked the sides, and had the meat catered spending almost $500 on food alone, I also ordered a bounce house for the kids, trying to make my guests as comfortable as possible including dress code etc… I tried to cover all my bases before the big day so everything can go off without a hitch, HOW NAIVE WAS I? The ceremony came and went, it’s was humid outside I was burning up in my wedding gown but it was worth it seeing MY DAVID in all white, he looked SOOOOO FINE! My mom was here to help me get dressed, my daughter was my maid of honor, my flower girl looked beautiful, the best man, papa, and my 3 brother/uncles were there to celebrate my big day, it was a special moment I will remember for the rest of my life.

The ceremony was beautiful, standing there next to David was as we looked into each other’s eyes was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before it was TRULY AWESOME, we said our vows, exchanged rings, and was pronounced MAN AND WIFE before God, family, and friends. We went to take photos as our guests began eating, within 15 minutes people started coming to us saying they’re goodbyes as they begin to leave, we hadn’t had our first dance yet nor did we have our daddy/daughter dance before people started leaving. At some point as I tried to make the best of the situation by dancing with my husband and papa but hardly NO ONE WAS THERE TO SEE IT and those who did stay weren’t paying attention, they were on their phones or talking in groups. The only people I saw watching us was my HOST FAMILY INCLUDING PAPA, they’re my family although I work for them. they’ve treated me like family and sacrificed a lot to help make my wedding day the best it could be and I will forever be grateful to them.

They had the house painted, trees trimmed, gutters changed, grass cut, and house professionally cleaned in order to make sure my guests are as comfortable as possible, my wedding planner was AWESOME, the girl got SKILZ she’s so creative and thought of everything including things I didn’t she made my life a lot easier knowing she had my best interest at heart we were in sync the entire time ABSOLUTELY NO BRIDEZILLA moments between us EVER! Everything was just soooo beautiful, it was great seeing all my guests, don’t get me wrong and yes I appreciate that they came and left words of encouragement and gifts but it still hurt when I looked around and saw the majority my guests leaving or had left, a couple people came long enough to say hello, give me a hug, one left money, the other noting at all, IT WAS DEFLATING AND EMBARRASSING at the same time and as I operated on adrenaline from sun up it didn’t really hit me until the next day when I went to help clean up and saw all the food left over, once that happened all the emotions just came out of me and I cried for about 10 minutes.

I’m aware some of my guests had personal issues they’re dealing with, I get that, I just thought maybe coming to our celebration might give them a reprieve from their situations even if it was for 2 to 3 hours. Also, 20 PLUS guests never showed up with NO NOTIFICATION to this day that’s why there was so much food left over so after getting over my anger and disappointment I called the BATTERED WOMEN’S SHELTER and donated the rest of the food and cupcakes that were left. There was less than 10 people who witnessed our cake cutting, no one took pictures, everyone was texting or scrolling on their phones, the music had issues because of poor wifi connection at the house so there were silent pockets in between due to no fault of the DJ’s own, he did the best he could with what he had, one guests son broke MY BRIDE GLASS so I have to replace it, no one hardly played on the bounce house it just sat there most of the night EMPTY!

I never would’ve thought MY WEDDING DAY would end in such a DUD!!! No one stayed to throw rice at us as we rode off into the sunset we left following each other because he rode the motorcycle so we can ride off on it afterwards BUT IT NEVER HAPPENED, we left together and went home to begin our honeymoon. I was so disappointed I couldn’t even focus on my husband, my feelings are hurt even as I write this to ya’ll I wouldn’t wish this hurt on my enemy let alone a friend. I just buried my FIRST COUSIN WHO WAS MURDERED the week before my wedding, my matron of honor had to cancel the morning of the wedding, my makeup person cancelled 2 hours before thank God we had a backup plan so it worked out in the long run, my mom brought the man she’s seeing whom I don’t like with her but thankfully he didn’t come to the wedding, (THANK GOD, IT WAS ONE OF THE FEW GOOD MEMORIES I HAD THAT DAY). No one in my huge 200 plus family attended my wedding but my mom and daughter, THEY DON’T TRAVEL, (UNLESS IT’S TO THE BAHAMAS, FLORIDA, ATLANTA, you know places like that, BUT NOT THEIR NEICE’S/COUSIN’S WEDDING, OH NO WE DON’T TRAVEL. That’s the excuse they gave me at the funeral and prior to that and I’M EXPECTED TO APPRECIATE WHAT I GOT INSTEAD OF WHAT I DIDN’T GET.

I’m quite sure if another bride had the same things happening to them that happened to me and my husband this past weekend they’d be just as hurt as I am. My husband has no idea I feel this way I’ve tried to hide my disappointment from him, I’ve been praying and reading my bible the last couple days asking the Lord to help me deal with my anger and hurt. I’m not holding any grudges against anyone who left because it’s not of God for me to do so I will just try to remember the way my husband looked at me expressing his eternal love and devotion to me for the rest of our lives, and how good he looked in his  wedding attire, we’re looking forward to a lifetime of love and we’re ready for anything that will try to divide us and break our covenant we made before God, we will have another wedding at our church in about a month, it will be a do-over for the previous ceremony, I can’t wait to see how it will be, my church is huge and beautifully decorated so I’m sure this one will be just as beautiful as the first in spite of the difficulties we faced.

My husband and I are thankful for those who took the time to attend and are grateful for the words of encouragement and gifts that were left behind we will read them together and try to implement them into our marriage in order for it to be successful as theirs. I’m going to need them to pray and teach me how to be a good wife to my husband whether they’re male or female, I will value both perspectives because my brother/uncles can give me advice on how to make my husband happy from a man’s point of view and the women from a woman’s point of view, either way WE ARE SET, OUR FRIENDS ARE PRAYING AS WE ARE THEM. I pray all is well with them since I saw them last and I look forward to seeing and or hearing from them soon. I AM MRS. MY DAVID HEYYYYYY. Lord Jesus thank you for forgiving me of my shortcomings and anger please help me to speak better no matter what the circumstance my dictate, take away my hurt and disappointment and help me replace the bad memories with good ones during our church wedding. Let the words I say be seasoned with salt in order for man to receive them and forgive me of my sins of omision and commission, in Jesus’ name we pray Amen. Be blessed my peeps we’ll talk soon


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